Pamuya - Do You Love Him?

So I didn’t know what to write for today’s teaser but I remembered something I did for my workshop last semester and I would greatly appreciate feedback (please comment below). In this scene, Annalee (in the regular italics) is conversing with Pamuya (in the bold italics) in her head. Annalee wants to know how she and Ayden can be she and Ayden after what he did (see Pamuya - Reunited), which leads to Pamuya revealing her feelings and asking Annalee a very important question. Enjoy.

Annalee POV

How do I do this? I finally asked her. There was so much about her I didn’t know, didn’t understand. And there was so much Pamuya didn’t know, didn’t understand about what happened to her either. We were both in the dark on this one.

What do you mean? It’s not like Ayden has ever sent me an invitation.

Somehow, I knew she never needed one, but I clarified, No, how do I let myself be with him? How do I trust him again? Even you still don’t fully trust him.

What Ayden did to me is vastly different from what he did to you. I know you’re hurt and angry and confused but I lost the love of my life that day. I saw the man I loved, whom I’d given up immortality for commit what I felt to be the ultimate betrayal. Although now, I’m not so sure. Things I once remembered or thought I knew, seem blurry, almost unreal.

That was a lot to unpack. While I felt what Ayden did was not okay, I didn’t see it as a betrayal. Our relationship was still new and I didn’t see the need for him to be loyal to me. Ayden was free to do what he wanted because we weren’t official. But he and Pamuya were beyond official. I couldn’t imagine giving up such a big part of myself for a boy.

In fact, before Ayden, there were hardly any boys because, again, of the whole issue of hurting someone. Who knew what I’d do if someone hurt me relationship wise? I’d probably destroy the planet.

Ha she laughed. You don’t have that kind of power. Yet.

You have the power to do that?

I am—was—a celestial being, I could move the stars and the heavens if I wanted to. I did once, but on a smaller scale. Just to please Ayden.

You still love him?

Of course. I never stopped loving him. I was just—

Upset at the whole being murdered thing I finished for her.

Yeah she deadpanned. Then she asked something I had never considered before, Do you love him?